The Bland Man

On the Terrace

Ben sits at the bar.  He's been sitting there for over an hour now, drinking his drinks, ordering the occasional appetizer, and staring out across Sunken Plaza.1  He still has a good hour until his meeting, but is starting to think about getting up and looking for a cab so he can look the place over before the actual meeting time - especially since the piano player will start in fifteen minutes and he has had enough of Al Amarjan minstrels for today.

A bland looking Al Amarjan man sits down at an adjoining table, and orders a drink.  He is dressed casually, and sports a noose necktie.  He appears to be in his early forties, in good shape but not particularly athletic, about six feet tall and perhaps 180 lbs.  He looks in Ben's direction and nods.

"I believe you called?" he says quietly.

Ben's eyes narrow as he scrutinizes the newcomer.  "It's possible," he says slowly.  "But I suppose that would depend on exactly who you are.  Why don't you introduce yourself so as I can better answer your question."

The man's expression remains bland.  In fact, everything about him remains bland.  He doesn't smile.  He doesn't illustrate his statements by moving his hands.  He doesn't arch his eyebrows.

Bland.

"My name is Petri, Islam Petri.  You called about a job.  We have a meeting set for 7:00 pm tonight."  The bland face turns briefly in Ben's direction.  "Is that sufficient?" the bland man asks before turning back to look out at Sunken Plaza once again.

"Good enough for me," agrees Ben. "But why the change of plans? And how is it that you knew where to find me?"

"For the first, I assure you that there has been no change of plans.  As to the second, I am not at liberty to say.  However, I will make the observation that you made the call from a public telephone."  The bland man remains bland.

"Which is why it should have been more difficult to find me, not less so," reasons Ben.  "But that's ok, I'm not really that fucking curious anyway.  Why don't we just get down to business.  What's this job you need done?"

Petri smiles at Ben's statement - a smile which reaches no further on his face than the corners of his mouth.  "As I said, I am not really at liberty to discuss the matter.  Before I discuss the job, why don't you tell me a little bit about what it is that you are qualified to do, why you are hear on the island, something of your work history, how long you intend to stay - that sort of thing.  If you have a resume that would be satisfactory."

Ben gives the guy a queer look, not quite sure if he's serious or just joking.  "A resume?  You gotta be kiddin' me.  What do you think yer hiring, a secretary?  Why I'm on the island and how long I intend to stay not only isn't any of your business but it's also not relevant.  As far as my job qualifications go, that's simple, you tell me what you need done and I'll tell you if I'm qualified."

"An interesting viewpoint," Petri replies, staring off across Sunken Plaza and watching the lights begin to come on across Al Amarja as the sun begins to set.  "One quite distinct from most prospective employees."  He pauses for a moment.

"You will understand I am certain if I inform you that I am as reluctant to answer your questions as you are to answer mine.  I will tell you free of charge that the requirements to loosen my tongue on this matter are either a personal recommendation from someone with whom I have worked in the past and whom I trust, or some tangible guarantee of your silence in this matter.  If you have the former, now would be the proper time to mention it.  As I am unfamiliar with you, at least to the extent necessary to give me enough leverage to compel your silence, and I am unwilling to invest the resources to simply purchase it with no guarantee of future returns, it seems that we are at an impasse.  Unless you can suggest some alternative?"

Ben slumps back into his seat with an audible sigh.  He takes a couple of sips of beer and then scratches at the stubble on his chin, staring all the while at Mr. Bland.

"I can't give you a personal recommendation," he finally says.  "I can't tell you about my work history, that would just prove that I couldn't keep silent.  The fact of the matter is, I can't give you any kind of guarantee, no one in my line of work can, no one.  I can, however, give you some advice.  If you really are Islam Petri, and if you aren't just some middle man, then you went about this very poorly.  If your gonna hire someone you don't know, you should do two things at the very least.  First, keep your name out of it.  And second, you should set up the contract through an intermediary.  That way, if things go wrong, your afforded some protection.  All you've managed to do today is waste both of our time."

Petri returns Bens stare.  Yep, this is most certainly someone that Ben wouldn't want to play poker with.

"Thank you for the advice," he says, his voice betraying nothing.  "I will certainly keep it in mind in the future - particularly the part about using an intermediary.  It seems like a wise precaution.  I would think that there would be a point of diminishing returns, however - intermediaries hiring intermediaries who themselves hire intermediaries.  In terms of security it would seem to me that there would have to be a limit on the number of cut outs one would wish to be involved.  For myself I imagine that one or two known and trusted individuals, proven successful in that sort of thing, would work best.  Also, there is the matter of efficiency and cost - while it is certainly desirable to have the highest security possible for any given secure transaction such as this one, it is likely that at some point it becomes cost and time ineffective to pile additional security measures on top of one another, particularly in the case of relatively low order operations.  To use this case, for example, I imagine it would have provided better security had the entire transaction been handled without anyone ever meeting anyone else - mail drops, scrambled telephone calls, and the like.  Even assuming that I had the resources to handle such activities, however, it seems to me that there would be other possible considerations such as cost and resource availability.  That, of course, assumes that I have more than one operation proceeding at any given time, and as such must spread these hypothetical resources among them."

Petri pauses for a moment, deep in thought.

"Of course all this is only speculation on my part.  You would likely know the ins and outs of such matters better than I.  A fascinating mental puzzle to sort out, however.  I shall be certain to devote additional planning time in future operations to incorporating these recommendations of yours."

"As for the value of our time, I obviously cannot speak for your perceived value of your own time, but mine has thusfar been well spent.  I regret that you seem uninterested in pursuing the matter further, as you certainly seem well versed in the methodology of such operations.  You are certain you will not change your mind?"

Ben shrugs.  "You should be asking yourself that question. The problem is on your end not mine. You say you can't trust me. You ask for some sort of guarantee. I say that you ask the impossible.  The only way you can know if you can trust me now is by taking a chance.  This is something you seem reluctant to do and with good reason I must admit. I'm still willing to help you not only with your immediate concern, whatever that might be, but also with your long term goals. If your looking to set up some sort of organization that can handle these matters, I could offer you my expertise as a consultant or maybe even on a more permanent basis."

Again Petri pauses in thought.

"Interesting...  most interesting indeed.  Your insight into transactions of
this nature is
certainly far beyond mine.  Until you pointed it out I had not, in fact,
realized that I had a
problem here."

Petri falls silent, deep in thought.  Several moments pass before he speaks again.

"Are you certain?" he asks.  "That the problem is mine, I mean.  I've considered the matter, and it seems to me that your assertion is valid only under certain conditions.  If the job market is such that individuals qualified for the sort of work I am looking for are rare and hard to find, then such individuals become a valued and highly sought commodity.  Under such conditions prospective employers such as myself would be required to make concessions to potential employees - in the mainstream job market these would take the form of hiring incentives, higher wages, improved benefits packages, etc.  In this sort of situation I would imagine that would extend to the employer being required to be more forthright and upfront in his description of the nature of the employment as well."

"However, if conditions were reversed - that is if there were a large number of individuals on the job market who were capable of performing the work required, I would think that the situation would be reversed.  In that case, it would be the prospective employee who would be required to be more open, forthcoming, and - well - competitive, and the employer who could dictate terms of the working relationship."

"Another interesting conundrum - certainly worth thinking about.  In the future, that is - time constraints prevent such deep contemplations at present, and in any event it really is not possible to rearrange matters extensively for purposes of this interview.  Nor is it necessary, since you have expressed willingness to help me not only with my present concerns but with future long-term considerations as well.  Your willingness to trust me in this situation is admirable and appreciated.  It pleases me that you are self-assured enough to agree to the terms of employment.  You're hired - provisionally."

Petri reaches into a jacket pocket and pulls out a folded piece of paper, reaches over, and places it on Ben's table.  "I would appreciate it if you destroyed that after reading it," he says.

Ben shakes his head, ready to deny that he agreed to any terms of employment, but then realizes that would probably just spark another lengthy oration, undoubtedly with more words such as conundrum thrown at him. So instead, he just picks up the piece of paper off the table, unfolds it, and hopes that it will finally give him a clue as to what the hell this guy wants done.
 

The Job

SUMMARY:  Test security measures, Club St. Augustine

LOCATION:   Club St. Augustine
                          St. Augustine Way

MISSION PARAMETERS:  Security of the Club to be tested and assessed both physically and astrally.  Actual penetration of Club security is not required, but evaluation of response times, nature of and location of security apparatus is.

REQUIREMENTS:  infiltration of Club St. Augustine,  astral assensing of club assessment of the proficiency, training, and armament of Club St. Augustine security personnel, assessment of security apparatus on site.

MISSION TIME PARAMETERS:  Mission to be completed within 168 hours of receipt of this document.  Written report to be prepared within 48 hours of mission completion.

PERSONNEL REQUIREMENTS:  recruitment of no less than four and no more than ten individuals, with the expectation of reemployment  in the event of satisfactory performance, is required.  Post mission assessment of mission personnel by mission head is required.

RESTRICTIONS:  no employees or guests of Club St. Augustine are to be killed or seriously injured.  Damage to the St. Augustine facilities should be kept to a minimum.

BUDGET:  the following funds will be made available for this operation1

Equipment budget:            $1,000.00
Operating expenses:          $1,000.00
Personnel hiring fees: up to $5,000.00 ($500.00 per individual)
Total:                       $7,000.00

The following funds will be made available upon successful completion of this operation2

Mission head payment:     $1,500.00
Personnel payment:  up to $5,000.00 ($500.00 per individual)
Bonus3:                   $1,000.00
Total:                    $8,000.00

COMMUNICATIONS: mission head to make report team readiness 24 hours in advance by discarding a paper drink cup in the fountain at the Plaza of Four Cardinal Points at any time during daylight.  Mission head will be contacted a minimum of 72 hours afterwards with instructions on where to deliver written report.

COMMENTS:  It is not expected that this operation will result in a breech of Club St. Augustine security – however, strenuous efforts are to be made to tax the club’s security to the utmost in order to make an accurate and complete assessment of its extent and capabilities.

1 Note that all budgetary items are earmarked for specific purposes.  Funds may not be distributed from one category to another.  Unused portions of any budgetary items must be returned upon completion of the mission.  Hiring fees are per individual, and are non-negotiable.   Funding has been placed in a Safe Deposit Box, First National Bank of The Edge, account #1826-6571-29-13, box #13.

2 Funding to be deposited within 24 hours of receipt of written report, as above.

3 Bonus funds may be distributed by the Mission Head among mission personnel as he sees fit at conclusion of the mission, based on performance.

* * *

Ben takes several minutes to digest the information from Petri's note before refolding the  paper and placing it back down on the table. "Are you adamant on the time limit? That could be a problem considering that I have to start from scratch. It might be several days before I can assemble a full team. It's still doable at a week, I just won't be able to be as thorough as I'd like."

"I regret the time constraint, but I am afraid that it is firm.  One week to do the job, with prior notice required."  Petri continues to be unreadable.  "There are...  other factors in play."

"Yeah ,yeah, there are always other factors in play.  I accept your terms.  The job'll be done in a week.  Is there anything else you wanted to add?"

"I believe that will be sufficient, save for a reminder that you destroy the piece of paper you are holding."  Petri rises.

"I look forward to hearing from you," he says, nodding once.  Then he turns to leave.
 

Renewing Friendship?

Ben kills off the last of his beer and stands, ready to take his leave as well.  He stuffs Petri's note inside his jacket for safe keeping until such a time as he can dispose of it properly.  Exiting the bar, Ben descends to the lobby and steers towards the front desk.

A very dark skinned woman in her late thirties stands behind the desk.  A red dagger pin on her lapel indicates that she is protected by Safe n' Sound.  As Ben approaches she looks up, the very soul of friendliness and professionalism.  Her name tag reads "Juliana."

"Can I help you, sir?" she asks.

"Yeah, I'm lookin' for a friend of mine.  Problem is I aint got no idea what room he's stayin' in.  If you can figure it out, I'd like to leave 'im a message.  His name's Ghishu, just Ghishu and no I don't know how to spell it."

The woman smiles politely.  "I'm afraid we cannot give out information on our guests, particularly without a last name or a room number.  If you leave a message I can check and leave it for him if he is here."

"Yeah, that's what I figured. God forbid you'd actually be helpful." Ben turns away from the front desk shaking his head with disgust. He heads up to his room.

Fortunately, Juliana is a professional, and quite familiar with all forms of abuse which can be heaped upon service personnel by disgruntled customers.  Consequently her smile remains intact, her "Have a pleasant evening," sounds neither sarcastic nor strained, and only way, far down in the privacy of her mind do phrases such as "kabiel gondhu"2 appear.

Ben makes it upstairs without difficulty.

Ben is staying in room 216, which means that if Ghishu was coming out his of his room when he ran into Ben in the hall earlier then he would be staying in room 215.  Hesitating in front of his room, Ben looks down the hallway to 215.

"Probably not back from Golden yet," he says to himself.  "I guess it couldn't hurt though."  Ben takes a few steps down the hallway and bangs on the door not really expecting an answer.

No answer in room 215.  However, Ben does notice that there is police tape over the door to 217.  Police tape eh? That's enough to pique Ben's interest.  He wanders down to take a look.

Well, it's police tape.  It's green.  It says ""SEALED - CRIME SCENE" on it, over and over and over again.  There is also a piece of paper stuck on the door with lots of legalese in small letters, and in bigger letters "CRIME SCENE.  FOR INFORMATION CONTACT THE AL AMARJAN PEACE FORCE AT 558940 CASE # DJ-113."

Now Ben is not exactly trained in Al Amarjan police procedures, but he does know that there's something not right about this picture, though he can't immediately put his finger on it.

Ben doesn't feel up to disturbing a crime scene today.

Figuring he's screwed around enough, he heads back down the hallway and enters his room.  He searches the room, looking for something to write on, finally noticing the customary pad of hotel stationary sitting next to the phone.  He takes one last look at Petri's note before scribbling down the bank account number.  Tearing off the sheet of paper, he stuffs it into his jacket for safe keeping. He crumples Petri's note into a ball, steps into the bathroom, and flushes it.
 
 
 

To Be Continued...


Notes:
1 For those not in the know, Cesar's bar is on the second floor, and features an outdoor patio overlooking Sunken Plaza.   Return
2 Urdu - "Big faggot."  Return

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